Do You Envision Yourself To Be A CEO?

I never imagined to be one but what if?

As I move up the corporate ladder, I often ask myself, what do I really want out of this corporate jungle thing. Will I continue to slave myself and make the owners wealthier. Do I enjoy servitude? Do I like sales, talking to people and all the shebang that goes with being a career woman?

I pause and ask myself. But sometimes, I can't even answer my own question.

I'm already in my mid-30s, the kids are in their teens, work has been good to me, so far. But there is something missing which I can't quite put my finger on.

Anyway, I replied, "yes". Why not? It's the penultimate of the ultimate.

Just thinking about it makes me cringe, it makes me feel old. In fact, in this blog I was regarded as someone who is in her 40s already. Maybe I speak/write like a 40-something. But how does a 40 something sound like? Tell me.

Opportunity Is Like A Thief In The Night, It Will Grab You When You're Most Vulnerable

When thoughts run dry, do you force yourself to write?

In the past, I try to post as often as I can. But I've been terribly busy the past few months and I have somehow, neglected my blog. I still write though. Every single day, in fact. But it's part of my gig thus, it's work.

Anyway, a lot of things have been going on lately. I moved into a new apartment (perhaps, the end of Generation B?) and I took care of my sick dad. I thought I'll end the year broke but I was wrong. I didn't win the lottery or something like that. I wish I did. But seriously, it's much more than that.

Let's just say I'm off to starting the new year with a bang. A really big bang. I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for making it happen.

Career trade-offs

At this time of the year, I usually get emails and phone calls from headhunters. But to date, not a single one. My job alerts are mostly BPO-related work. BPO jobs are fine but I miss client face to face interaction. I miss speaking before an audience. I miss trainings abroad. These are the things I had to let go in exchange for a more advanced insurance environment. While it's true that I got what I wanted, I couldn't discount the fact that there were things, tempting as it was, that I simply have to live without.

Rise above

While it's true that the news has become depressing each day, this article by Ben Stein is a source of inspiration for us to be always on our toes and not allow ourselves to be part of the statistics.

"If you spend the day reading about how bad things are, you will never get out of bed. If you put down the paper and get to work, and then work twice as hard and twice as smart as you used to, and maybe take less pay right up front, you will get ahead.

Here is a lesson from my father: In every economic era, there is always a shortage of talented, creative, well-educated workers. Be one of those workers.

I think of my pal Barron Thomas, a talented salesman of airplanes and related items and services. Since the recession hit in earnest in the fall, I hardly get to talk to him. Why? Because he works all the time. He makes the deals the other guys are too lazy or short-sighted to make. If you absolutely, positively want it to be sold, if you want to buy at the best price, you go to Barron Thomas. The flight world knows it, and he gets sales. Plus, he doesn't get depressed, because he's working too hard to get depressed. He gets that endorphin rush, that glorious feeling of self-esteem one gets from working hard and being exhausted at the end of a successful day.

My point isn't to plug Barron. He's got a huge reputation already. My point is to tell you that the hard-working people will still get work. They will have money to spend. They will spend it, and eventually it will pull us out of this darned recession."

It will take years before we feel the (positive?) effects of President Obama's stimulus package. In between that time and now, what are we supposed to do? Wait in vain? Sulk in depression? Diss our jobs?

One thing I'm sure about is that there will be people who, despite the awful economic situation, will rise above and still be successful. And by the time the recession is over, they already have a huge head start.

The second degree

I'm contemplating of going back to to school, again, next year. MBA, it's not.

Career-wise, things have been quite steady (read: boring). If no workshop or training is available to stimulate my mind or brush up my skills, I better do something about it. Quitting is one; going back to school is another.

Twice in a row, I have enrolled via distance education. Studying in solitude, communicating with virtual classmates was a tad challenging. One has to focus on the goal of finishing the entire course within the set schedule of the university. Procrastination was very tempting. Otherwise, you either drop your subjects or discontinue the studies for good. Unavoidable circumstances, work and family demands took a toll on me at some point. I didn't get sick nevertheless. But the sheer exhaustion of multitasking drained me.

And now, I'm thinking of studying again. For one, I don't plan on studying again just because I'm bored. There's always that ultimate goal as to what I really want to do with my life.

Reflecting on the "Last Lecture"

Earlier during my break, Inside Edition featured Randy Pausch, a 47-year-old Computer Science professor at Carnegie Mellon University. He has terminal pancreatic cancer and has been on chemotheraphy to slow down the growth of the tumors. His last lecture,"Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams", was addressed to a 400-member audience, consisting of fellow professors and students at the university. In a nutshell, he talked about his childhood dreams and how he achieved most of it.

Wouldn't it be great to realize most, if not, all of our childhood dreams? After watching that particular segment, it made me think what my childhood dreams were. Sometimes I have silly moments thinking I shouldn't have grown up. The freedom that is to be a child... I do not worry about tomorrow because I know in my heart, my parents would take care of everything. A child lives in the present with little or no regard for the future.

But life doesn't work that away.

I have dreamt of becoming a doctor but decided not to pursue it because I'm too squeamish at the sight of blood. Besides, medical school was too expensive. It still is, anyway. I also thought of becoming a nurse however, the drive to be one wasn't that much. I don't want to be a half-baked nurse. I also thought of becoming a flight attendant but I lack swimming skills. And so, I've forgone that idea, too. I've dreamt about becoming an engineer. I almost was but I quit midway through my college years. The math was too much and physics for me was unintelligible. I've dreamt of seeing Mickey Mouse in real life and that came true. I've dreamt of traveling to different places and that too, came true. And so on and so forth.

We dream big. Children always do. We may think that some our childhood dreams are silly or sometimes, impossible. To bridge that chasm we create between ourselves and the sought-after "dream" is to make it happen. Act on it. Act on your dream. Take the risk. Try.

Prepping up for the Day

It's three more days to go before D-day. I almost have all my documents completed. Almost because the application is still with the agent. If you ask me, all the agent did was key in all my personal details in the application form.

I have been religiously reading immihelp.com and practicing my responses everyday. I fervently hope that this time, everything will work out fine. I need it badly.

Am I too much of an optimist?

My ex told me that I'll end up eating my own words once I work in the US/Canada. After a long discussion, I surmise that it was fear and probably guilt that's eating up his spirit.

We all have to work our asses off to make a living. It's just that each of us has their own respective profession or job. His job is a job he chose. Nobody pushed him. The present situation is a factor but it still his call.

Using other people's life as a barometer to yours would only lead to disappointment. I say, set your own standards. Your life, your goals, your dreams are different from them.

It amazes me when people think I have it all easy. Ha!

Just as I thought

History repeated itself yesterday. I think I should stop hallucinating on matters that are never meant to be. I would have reacted violently but chose not to. What for? And what good would it do me?

There's too much delay already. I need to re-focus again. (I know it's redundant. It's intentional.)